My name is Sara...

This is the year of my 30th birthday. I'm very excited about this because I've come a long way in the past few years and I have some very good things to show for it.

Chuck and I have been married for three years and have known each other for just over 13 years. We now have a beautiful baby girl, Rachel, who will be turning one this October. She's amazing and is changing so fast.

We just made the move from MI to live closer to my fam in WI and were able to purchase our first house.

rough day

Rachel and I had a rough day today. Just about anything that could go wrong did.

Yo, here is my make mommy feel better picture...

Happy Birthday Grandma

four generations - Thanksgiving 2009

my three (and a half) year old

So I just finished reading the book Your Three Year Old: Friend or Enemy. It's from a series of books by Louise Bates Ames on child development. Some of the examples are outdated but the child development information is right on. One of the major points in the series is that children go through periods of balance and turbulence. The half year period tends to be a more turbulent time emotionally and physically as kids develope. As one parent educator explained to me it's like building a tower of blocks. You have three blocks stacked up and the half-year comes along and knocks them down. Okay, so they have to be picked up and restacked but they don't always go back in the same order.

Although Rachel is not quiet 3 and a half she is already started her turbulent period. She has a hard time expressing herself. She stumbles and stutters and trails off mid-thought. Rachel has regressed in potty training which has been difficult but not unusual with a new baby at home. She is stubborn, anxious, contrary and insecure. She has trouble sleeping, has nightmares and is afraid of the dark. I go from felling extreme frustration with her to feeling complete sympathy for her. She's having a hard time and I try to keep that in mind when she's doing something that drives me up the wall.

Rachel is very bright, perceptive, loving, energetic, charismatic...I could go on and on. She really is a delightful person and I have to remember that when things get difficult. I'm very happy that I have a parent group that I can talk to about it. There are many moms that can relate and give good advice. I've also been blessed to have Fran Swift in my life. She has made me feel more confident as a parent. Fran understands child development so well that she almost has a smile on her face when I say I need to talk to her because we're at a half-year. She's very reassuring.

I'm starting a new book: Raising Your Spirited Child by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka. This book, like the child development series, has already put me more at ease. I can see that this book and the class I'm going to take based on the book are going to do a lot to improve my relationship with my spirited child.

january

This January has been a rough month and I'm glad to see it coming to a close. At the end of December I made an appointment to see my midwife and was officially diagnosed with Postpartum Depression. I started medication immediately and have seen impressive results. I feel like a new person. I've had one appointment with my new therapist and have three more scheduled. I think it was a good match. I'm glad I know myself well enough that I recognized something was wrong and that I had the strength to do something about it. Chuck was put on notice: If at anytime I start acting that way again he is to do something about it immediately even if he thinks I'll be mad at him.

Speaking of Chuck, he was told at the end of December that he would be required to work out of town Monday through Friday and be required to work from home on the weekends throughout the month of January. This has been really hard on all of us. Chuck was working unreasonable hours. He said that he was in the office until 11:30 some days. When he was home and had to go to work it really confused Rachel. She had the hardest time with it. On more than one occasion she'd melt down in the afternoon (when she was already overtired) and want a hug from Daddy. She cried for an hour one afternoon last week, "I want my Daaaaaad! I need a hug from my Daaaad!" It was heart breaking. I called him up so she could talk to him and that only made it worse.

Ugh. I'm really glad we made it through this month. Chuck deliverd his project yesterday and went out and got drunk. He surprised us by coming home early today. That made my day. He brought the mail in when he got here and there was a package from one of his superiors addressed to me. It was a Harry and David gift box thanking me for being so understanding while Chuck worked so hard. I can't say that I was very understanding (in fact I think one time I may have mentioned delivering a flaming bag of poo to someone's doorstep), but I'll take the truffles and fruit thank you.

Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad